"So...What brought you to New York City?"

"So...What brought you to New York City?" I get this question a lot!!! Especially, when people realize I wasn't born here and let me tell you, a lot of people just assume I am from here because I fit in, meaning, I don't take no mess, I'm a Heebster and I walk really really fast, because you know, "Time is money!" and this is "Money-Makin' Manhattan". So, when I answer this very common question I try and gage the answer to my audience. I have some boiler plate retorts ready to go... before I utter the words... I wonder to myself, "Hrmmmm...what version of the truth do you want?!?!"

Top 10 Reasons I tell people why I moved to NYC:

1. It's been a dream I had since I first toured the Big Apple when I was 12 years old
2. I belong here, Dammit!
3. Its my Ancestral American Homeland and the Center of the fucking World, Duh!
4. I was tired of living in the American Jewish Diaspora so I decided to make Aliyah
5. I've lived everywhere else I wanted to live and this is the final city on my East Coast Tour
6. "If I can make it here, I can make it anywhere!"
7. I didn't fit in anywhere else, so I needed to move to the city filled with misfits
8. I have unfinished business so I came here to legitimize myself
9. "The devil made me do it!"
10. I came here to meet a "Naughty but Nice Jewish Boy" and raise a Jewish family